Speaking my mind

This is something I really need to improve upon, speaking my mind.

I know what y’all are thinking, that seems pretty inaccurate given how I typically spout off at the mouth everyday. But that’s not really what I mean.

The one thing I’ve never really been good at is confronting a conflict.

Sure, I can do this when it comes to client work, but not so much in my personal life.

Between toxic friends, an abusive roommate, bad relationships, and the occasional office spat, I’ve taken a lot of abuse these past couple years. And honestly, I let it happen.

I’m plenty prepared to bitch and moan about these issues but I’m no good at actually standing up for myself.

What gives?

Why can’t I just sit down and have an adult conversation with someone when I feel I’ve been treated unfairly? Why do I continue to let myself get walked on?

I sorta feel like part of it is that when I’ve told friends how I felt before (sure, maybe not in the most tactful way at times) it’s blown up in my face causing huge fights and even ending friendships.

Seriously, I lost a friend of 20 years because I told her she was being selfish – when she legitimately was I might add.

And whenever I told a certain ex-boyfriend about concerns I had he always made me feel guilty – as if all our problems were my fault.

I need to realize that not everyone is like that, but I guess these bad experiences have really made me think twice about voicing my concerns. Or, at least, that’s what I tell myself.

Any advice for being less of a doormat?

Cheers!

-A